Hillary Clinton has always struggled with her public image. Even back when her husband Bill was president, a lot of Americans had a pretty low opinion of her.

This wasn’t helped by her obvious disdain for women who choose to make their families and homes a priority … remember her famous campaign trail quip about how she could have “stayed home and baked cookies” instead of pursuing her profession?

Never mind that this was during her husband’s campaign … her personal political aspirations have always been on full display.

Fast-forward four years after that gaffe and Clinton was still working to bridge the gap between her obvious political elitism and the lives of everyday Americans. A 1993 attempt at federal health care reform in shambles, her image continued to suffer.

To Clinton’s thinking, the best way to soften that image was to release It Takes a Village, a book outlining her policy prescriptions for our nation’s children. For someone who is so obviously out of touch with the life of the home, this was laughable from the start.

The title is a shortened version of the proverb, “It takes a village to raise a child,” which has been loosely attributed to several African tribes. In the pages of the book, Clinton focused on the community around a child, not the family, as formative. Unsurprisingly, this sparked a backlash among conservatives, even inspiring Christian senator Rick Santorum to write a rebuttal called It Takes a Family.

Clinton’s book brought the phrase “It takes a village” into everyday Americans’ speech where it remains to this day. Just recently, during a panel discussion on motherhood at my church, one of the speakers said it while discussing raising her kids, and it got me thinking.

The Christian conservative backlash to Hillary Clinton’s use of the phrase back in the 90s makes sense because, unsurprisingly, she took it to mean that the government had a duty and even a right to intervene in the parent-child relationship; to fill in the blanks with programs, entitlements, and incentives.

While there are situations in which parents cannot or will not fulfill their God-given responsibility to their kids, it’s worth considering that, as with many programs, government involvement in kids’ lives sadly makes it easier for parents to shirk their duty.

However, in context, the concept of a group of people contributing to the growth and formation of children is rooted in biblical truth. Jesus Himself was a member of a tribe and would have been raised within a community that knew Him almost from birth. It’s very possible that the many African tribes that, in their language and parlance, have a proverb that equates to “It takes a village to raise a child” are among the millions of Bible-believing Christians on the continent.

So too, any of us who have raised or are raising kids rely on the support and help of others who love the Lord and our families.

My husband’s work often calls him away on Sundays and as a result, two to three weekends a month, I attend church solo with my three kids. With a six-year-old and three-year-old who love to run around with their friends (while downing whatever snacks they can find) after service is over, it can be difficult for me to wrangle them out the door while trying to also attend to the needs of my infant.

I have lost count of how many times a friend who knows us and our situation has swept one or both of them up in their arms and run toward the door or challenged the kids to a race to the parking lot. These simple acts mean more to me than I can say, and they are just one example of the “village” I have around me that makes my parenting easier while also reminding me that I need a community to thrive.

But there are two caveats I would add to the idea that “it takes a village.”

First, raising kids is hard work, but as parents, it’s nobody’s responsibility but our own. If we have a community that is also pouring into them, praise God, but those friends and family members are not ultimately duty-bound to do it.

Second, it may take a village, but we get to choose the village. Just because an adult is in our sphere doesn’t mean he or she is permitted to help form our kids. We can and must pray for wisdom to know how to build a community around us and our children. This goes for everything from how we choose to school our kids to whether we let them go to a friend’s house, from which family members are permitted to spend time alone with them to who we invite into our homes.

I, for one, am thankful for the “village” my husband and I have been blessed with.

It’s been hard-won, taking years to form and refine. But as valuable as it is, it can never replace us. Even on the days when we feel overwhelmed by parenting, God has given us everything we need, because, in His wisdom, He gave them to us to steward.

What a responsibility, and what a gift!