I frequently hear people express concern about bringing children into the world when so much is uncertain and unsettled.
Here are some primary reasons people are uncertain about bringing children into the world.
Stress and Unhappiness: Many people believe children will put a strain on their romantic relationships, hinder their free time and create an annoyance. Parents often post memes on social media whenever school starts celebrating being able to send their children away.
Many parents can’t wait to be rid of their children after having to endure them all summer. This sends a message that children are undesirable.
Financial Burden: Some fallaciously claim it takes $250,000 to raise a child from birth to adulthood. While most families with children realize this is not true, the fear that a child might “miss out” on some expensive program or opportunity discourages some people from even having children in the first place.
Lack of Personal Independence: Many Americans has stated that maintaining their own independence is a primary motive for not wanting to have children. It seems “freedom and autonomy” are higher values for many than sacrificial caregiving. They believe they will live a happier and more fulfilled life if they don’t have any children to tether and repress them.
Personal goals, careers, and hobbies are valued over the responsibilities and sacrifices that come with parenthood.
Health and Well-being: Some women resent the change having children will make to their own physical bodies. The discomfort, loss of youthful figure and the pain of childbirth discourage many from wanting to experience pregnancy and birth.
Some also cite their own mental health as a motivator, believing a child will cause them to be overwhelmed, which they see as being something to be avoided at all costs (even if it means not having children).
Overpopulation and Sustainability: Many fear that global over-population can lead to depleting the earth’s natural resources, straining the infrastructure, and increasing competition for limited necessities like food, water and fuel.
I have written a previous article on this topic for Illinois Family Institute entitled, The New Demographic Winter.
Climate / Environmental Concerns: Representative Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez has questioned whether it’s responsible to bring children into a world facing “global climate change.” Her sentiment is echoed by many young people, who may choose not to have children or have fewer children due to the “carbon footprint” those children will leave on the planet.
Safety: I also hear people express concerns about global terrorism, school shootings, bullying, etc. They fear they will not be able to protect their children from all harm, so they suppose it might be better to not let them live in the first place.
Are Things Really Worse Today than in the Past?
I was born in 1975. Vietnam was still visible in the rear view mirror, as was Watergate and the turbulent 60s revolution.
There were gas rations, and the economy was in the tank (and about to get way worse under Jimmy Carter).
Hal Lindsey had started a frenzy predicting that Jesus would likely return at any moment and many Christians were saying no one should have kids because the world was coming to an end.
This kind of thing happens in every generation. People always think it’s the worst time in human history (although our time is WAY better in so many ways than most eras in human history).
What Did God’s People Do When Living in Babylon?
When God’s people were slaves in Babylon, God commanded them NOT to decrease their population. God’s advice to them was very counter-intuitive to the common thinking of humans.
“This is what the LORD of Hosts, the God of Israel, says to all the exiles who were carried away from Jerusalem to Babylon: ‘Build houses and settle down. Plant gardens and eat their produce. Take wives and have sons and daughters. Take wives for your sons and give your daughters in marriage, so that they too may have sons and daughters. Multiply there; do not decrease. Seek the prosperity of the city to which I have sent you as exiles. Pray to the LORD on its behalf, for if it prospers, you too will prosper’” (Jer. 29:4-7).
Even in a time where wicked and godless people were in complete command, God’s people were not to live in despair. They were not to simply give up and hope to die.
They were to remember that God had a plan for their future, and they were to live with hope in Him.
What Should Christians Do?
God never rescinded his command in Genesis 1:28 to “be fruitful and multiple, fill the earth and subdue it.” He never took back what He said in Malachi 2:15 when He informed us that He made married because He wanted godly offspring.
Christians have a simple mandate. Live for Jesus and tell others about Jesus. It’s not all that complicated. We do what we do regardless of what crazy people in the world do. Our mandate is faithfulness. That has always been the mandate of the Church.
There is every reason to be optimistic in this hour. Light shines brightest in the darkness. We have an amazing opportunity for Kingdom impact. God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of love, power, and a sound mind.
Do what God has called you to do and trust Him to take care of the details.
He has promised to never leave or forsake us (Heb. 13:5) and He said He would be with us until the end of the age (Matt. 28:20). We need to take Him at His word. God is not afraid of any other puny little earthly leader or political party. In fact, He sits in Heaven and laughs at them (Ps. 2:4).
We shouldn’t fear them either (Ps.118:6).
Rather than fearing our circumstances, we need to fear the Lord. We are promised that is the best place to be.
“He who fears the LORD is secure in confidence, and his children shall have a place of refuge” (Prov. 14:26).