In the wake of Erika Kirk’s speech at Charlie Kirk’s Memorial Service, a lot of conversation has been sparked regarding her statement of forgiveness towards her husband’s murderer:

“On the cross, our Savior said, ‘Father, forgive them for they not know what they do.’

That man– that young man, I forgive him.”

Some have criticized these remarks that Erika’s statement lacks a true understanding of what true, biblical forgiveness is.

This begs the question: what is forgiveness?

From a biblical perspective, forgiveness is a “dismissal” or “release.”

In the relationship of believers to God, forgiveness is a dismissal of our sin debt. Colossians 1:14 is clear that in Christ, believers have “redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of sins.”

Forgiveness is a vital part of the believer’s life as it is one of the marks of a true believer.

“For if you forgive others their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you, but if you do not forgive others their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.” – Matthew 6:14-15

“And whenever you stand praying, forgive, if you have anything against anyone, so that your Father also who is in heaven may forgive you your trespasses.” – Mark 11:25

Forgiveness is central to who God is.

When Moses asked to see God’s glory on Mount Sinai in Exodus 33, God’s response was to show Moses His goodness.

God reveals Himself as someone who is slow to anger, abounding in steadfast love, merciful, and gracious. (Exodus 34)

God’s glory is His character. And forgiveness is central to what He reveals about His character.

However, it is vitally important to note that forgiveness and reconciliation are two different biblical concepts that are often conflated.

Christ’s words on the cross, “Father, forgive them” was a fulfillment of the prophecy found in Isaiah 53:12 – “He made intercession for the transgressors.”

Not only is this prayer of intercession a fulfillment of prophecy, but it reveals that forgiveness and reconciliation are different.

Those who nailed Jesus to the cross had not repented when Jesus interceded for them.

Illinois Family Institute’s Dave Smith comments,

“He did not wait for their apologies, for they could not comprehend the enormity of their sin. They did not realize they were crucifying not merely an innocent man, but the holy Son of God—the very Savior of the world…

Forgiveness isn’t weakness. It’s strength. It’s freedom. It’s a vital part of Christian sanctification and the way we reflect Christ, who prayed even for those who crucified Him.”

In relation to Erika Kirk, her forgiveness of Charlie’s murderer is completely in line with Scripture.

Pastor and author, Costi Hinn, in a recent podcast, commented on this truth:

“Forgiveness does not mean there will be no justice. Forgiveness also is not reconciliation. Forgiveness only takes one because forgiveness defined biblically is: ‘I am releasing you.’…

Erika released Charlie’s killer… She’s saying, ‘In my heart, I will not hold this against you. I will not let it eat me every day and I will not think about you and let you hijack my life in bitterness…

It’s not reconciliation, and reconciliation takes two… Reconciliation is ‘I confess and I repent… and you forgive me…’ And together, we release the issue.”

While reconciliation is and should always be the goal of forgiveness, it is not always achievable, possible, or safe.

For example, it is entirely possible and biblical for a woman to forgive her rapist. It is not wise, possible, or safe for her to reconcile.

When asked whether or not she is seeking the death penalty, Erika responded that she will allow the government to decide that for her (Romans 13). Forgiveness entrusts oneself to a faithful God who will bring justice on our behalf. This is exactly what Erika Kirk is doing.

Christian, when we forgive, we entrust our justice to God and are released from the hatred and bitterness that can grow when we are wronged.

While forgiveness is hard and difficult, it is nonetheless necessary and biblical.

As C.S. Lewis wrote in his book, Mere Christianity,

“Everyone thinks forgiveness is a lovely idea until he has something to forgive.”